ohs..i'm on a holiday mood now!..lolx..so fast!

mum is sad today. coz her colleague passed away. she told me she cried at work. frankly speaking, i'm so bad. haha!

this story taught or rather reminds me again..cherish everyone around me. if i can.
this is wat happened:

mum still saw her .colleague yester and toked to him. He was still well and toking and scolding one of the person under him. (she dropped two pieces of meat on da floor)
this morning, the whole of ntuc gt to noe that that supervisor passed away, SUddenly!.
the whole of ntuc has gt no mood to work coz they like him so much as he was too gd!
mum was one of them, she din even have da appetite to eat. [omg]
but that supervisor..as if noe he was gonna die.
he called one of his colleague yester during evening to tell her to learn how to order stocks as she wld be starting to order on wed. *strange*..and there he goes..died last midnite.
his last words was to ask ah lo to" take care of the fish department ".

ya..so..cherish everyone!~hope that i will say wat i do!

^cherish^

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i so tired now!....have been bending my head down for consecutive 2hr30mins!...i guess my head is too heavy.haha!....anyway..i am having weird dark circles now..=(.
so sad!
only one eye have it.
i wonder y, seriously.
llolx.

the maths test..stoopid one..we did wif so much effort and in the end..it is to be marked by ourselves..diaos.

feel bad today actually. i forgt my calculator and dad has to send it to me.
thanns daddie..=)
heex

^head dropping^

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i'm so tired today. guess i'm gonna brush my teeth and go slp soon. too tired. can feel my puffy eyes..TT
look so ugly now.=(
muz get back my slp to become a prettie ger again=X

trust me ornt..but i have been studyin hard today!.
ya..sounds mugger..=[

but.....i only mug at certain period of a time.
i hate it when peeps call me that..i reallie get piss off~~.
so...i'm gettin quite unhappy wif someone.
llolx
but forget it. its okae

nites.

^mug till tired^

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thanx folks for caring for me..=)
i'm juz down wif very minor illness. slight flu...and sore throat.
thanx so much for all u gers care!...=)))

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i fear...i fear i mistaken wat i am feelin.
i fear...i fear that i would bbring to ya da wrong ideas.
i fear ..that i wld lose a fren again in that same way..i aldy lost one since march, i dun hope so again.

but when ya are feelin empty..someone is there for ya...ya tot..finally..someone to rely on again.
ya are nt so lonely in da world.
but it juz seems so wrong sometimes! u get nervous and excited over msges in msn n sms-es
but...when ya see him....ya feel nth...sometimes..irritated but ya do care for him still.
wats gg on?!.

the ability to rationalise to fading off...
wat are all these?
it seems like a dream in reality ... reality floatin in dreams~
i dun wish myself to bring to anyone false hopes either..coz i noe it hurts.
but it seems like it is happening..
wat is gg on??

^wat is gg on?!^

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i so happie!...gt to nap yester and this afternoon.
simply...LURVE IT!..
rest to go a longer distance.
thats wat i will do now.

btw..these few days....someone alerted me.
he made me realised that many of the times..when someone appears to be happie..he is otherwise in his heart.
he is cryin.

this made me realise..perharps we should learn..learn to hear the inner voices and not look at surface expressions. but...how?

not all of us can do that. aint so?
it takes high level of observance..quality mind and understanding to do that.
for me..i'm striving...striving towards that!

i'm also llooking for someone that can tell how am i feelin..its reallie hard, i noe. but then sometimes it wld be too scary to have someone eyes "penetrating" into ya.

enough of that...ya...i helped mum wif da cookin todaze!...somethin i like to do since young..that is while mum is cooking..kpo kpo help abit..heex..=).
dishes cooked..chilli prawns and veg.[ some dunnoe call wat]..[]

^finally, i noe^

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A song that i liked for veri long..the lyrics are seriously nice!..check it out...though its a very old song aldy.

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oh ya....i forgt to mention sth too!..

i saw alvin today. loll.x...he changed though the difference was not that great. it was nice seeing him again, somehow i feel. although i think i look like i am grasping for air when i saw him.

i think he saw me but he forgt hu am i or did i change lotsa?
toking bout change...XL>>!...ya haven tell me how did i change last time?.....though now dun have aldy...i wish to noe..tell me some other time when we are both free!...=/

i'm studying for phy timed-pract now but i am half-dozing off.
thats y i decided to take a break...perharps...hmm......take a small naps yea..llolx....

^dozing off^

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i hope i wun get any concussion. the bloodie volleyball hit me hard on my head today!...by an unknown guy!...it was so pain!...that i teared!.....T_T

that guy din even bother to find out hu he have hurt!.....the rest of the gals are so persistant in finding out hu is that and demand a apology for mie. thans gals!....ya gers are great.!

its still painful now!...my head...right side of my head. sobs.

and ya..when i went for jogging in the evening, i saw so many COCKCOACHES!..llolx....
one of them was on a ger;s blouse...i was looking at it for a long time. her frens look at me wif a bewildered look. llolx......i actually pondered to tell her or not

guess wat?..in the end, i did. i said.."ni bei hou you ga zua"..haha..she stood up on the chair and turn around..askin her other two fren "wher, wher!?" ..she couldnt see it and tot i am jk wif her!.....then i said..erm...ur blouse..haha...her fren then saw and the 3 gals screamed and screamed. i dunnoe wat happened after that...coz i have walked away.

haha..i'm quite surprise that i wld interfere in such things..haha..

^volleyball "hurt-ed" mie^

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OMg...jas..ur quiz is so true~!!..or izzit juz pure coincidence?!..

Your view on yourself:

Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

the seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

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haix..my hopes of going clubbing yester are DASHED!...i am really sian diao......i miss club sooooo much..haix.

in the end..i went play poolx wif sis. after that went changi village. oh..changi village is damn nice now!...i LUVE IT !!!! seriously!.....so nice...it has changed..from ther can see the jetty and they are playing loud love songs..omG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

heavenly~

^fabulous^

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went out today, wif wayne..ph n sh.
i am like out to SIT today..llolx...its quite bored but it actually deleted all my stress once again!..i was feelin so frustrated and sad when i was doing maths in sch...now..i feel better

hmm..i certainly have to buck up now!...and...start MUGGING HARD!

^sit around^

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ehs...i think i am kinda stubborn sometimes rite?...or...izzit.most of da times? suddenly think i am. llolx.hmm..i'm plaanning to skip tml's meetin..hope it wil be successful! seriously sick of the meetings...haix...the woes of being ex-co....SIGHs

^stubborn?^

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---

pain
painn
stomachache now!...ran to da loo several times!...llolx.....
feel so much better now!..
finally my com is reformat-ed.!
i miss onlin-ing...oh no. coz.......OH NO!...cant say yea

alot of things..i cant say here sometimes...so i have diary too..for top secrets of myself!...hahas.....sound so kiddy!

i'm so happie. jerica says i am getting back to my old-self!...that is a gd news for me!
i'm so happie. at that news. serious. i really hope i can become my 100% happie-go-lucky and craziii gers!...i am waiting for that.

llolx...and guan yan and kenneth said that they always see me chiong hm..haha...coz i simply miss HOME. =)

^delighted^

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yoz..folks..its really a tired day today yet i juz juz feel like blogging still!..i mean..ya..i dunnoe..it has become a habit that is really hard to forget.llolx

i reach hm at 730pm today coz of OP workshop!..finally...we finished our op presentation as in the workshop. ya..i think serkun is quite sasds.serkun....cheer up!..u are still our best leader!!!!yays!...dun be sad..though yu wun see this but..its okae..coz nxt time when i ownself read..i noe..hu i needa thank...even before.

as for sth else...oh no..i think things are getting abit out of control! i seriously dunnoe wat to do now. some things..the more we avoid..the more it gonna come..haix...really......omg omg...y muz it be like ttat????..i seriously dun hope so!..hope everything wld be over soon.......asap!

^dun fall in luv!^

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---

look folks..i did wat i said last nite..or in the EARLY MORNING??...i juz came back from joggin...the second thing i did today. after eating a small pandan cake. i went jogginG!!!...hees!...

coz i simply feel very vexed!..ARGH!!! can i juz shout a big
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!


arrrrraRRRRRRRRRRRR!

^vexed^

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llol.....ya..pw meetin quite a success today.
yays!

haha. each of us gt our own comments regardin our presentatn...haha...=_)
after that..i went town.hahas.shop wif sis and meet a while wif wayne.
abit boliao.

^happie^

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yos...yoz...yeo's? haha..i'm crazii.

i have the sudden urge to go crazii today. CRAZiiiIIi lalallalal hohohohoho! blablabla...

jas: antukutalawa aisiao boMpboMpboMp. gilaumphroll daz

haha...okaes. but i doubt i can go any crazi today. i got to go serkun's hse ltr again.
to practice..oP. % s% i% g% h% z%.

oh, did i tell u folks about this mr gd gal in my sch?...in my pw grp?...haha.....he is serkun!......note: no "iLL" intention. i juz wanna share wif u folks how some guys can be really so gd?....at least up till now. i think gals in my class will admit tt. llolx. he gave in some much so much to gals. talented etc. composing a song when he knew nth bout piano. patient. gentle. helpful.

actually, i'm aso lazy to further elaborate. coz feel tt is nt quite impt.=X......the purpose of this blog..perharps is to encourage every gd sista of my to cont searchin for someone really gd..there will be...there will!...HOPEFUlly?

^crazzziiii^

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oosh..i superb tired today.
i'm missing lotsa peeps too.
so fast..so fast. i shldnt! shld try to stop myself.llolx.

ther's 爝火meeting today. so sian. i feel like getting out of this thing! its really a heavy burden~~

i got to do pw's presentation today..arghs..pw aGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!.
sick of it manz.

^frens are to be cherished not forever^

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freakin...llolx...its a nice word. i think. it sounds cute.! a word that i like to use alot too.
but...when used wrongly, it become a word with thorns.
with durian thorns.
with rose thorns.
with needles.
with gun shots.
with poison.
with everything THAT HURTS

^HURTs^

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YEsterdaze..once more..no. nEver.

sadsadsadsadsad
extremely disappointed.disappointed.
besides that, no other things worth for me to say again.
its not easy to find someone that understand yu. when yu tot they do..they gave yu response showing otherwise. Its juz so hard, i guess.


it seems like a real unlucki daze yesterday. lotsa things happened. nt to mention the major one but even in kbox..i spilled the watermelon juice..wat da...haix...nvm. lucki they can be washed of easily

^disappointeddddddddddddd^

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moNday

its a special day. Mon. wats so special?....coz i went back bartley. although i din tok to the teacher much..sighhx~~~but the thing to be happie bout maybe is...i cume home wif a barTLEY BEAR and $20 popular voucher!...heex...so happie that i gt a bartley bear now!.....its juz a few days ago that ada, jasper, minyuan were showing everybody their cedar bear, nanyang bear, aj's bear etc. though bartley's bear might stand out to be nth among them...it is the brightest "lighthse" in my mind! =)

junyi was great!...she gt $1200. i really really envy her!...imagine..$1200..wow i can do lotsa lotsa things but anyway..congrats!..haha

junyi treated us to sakae sushi. *yums!* thanx junyi!...ur first treat to me. i'll rmb!..heeex

i was dragged to watch BeWitched or rather being psychoed. See, my weakness! folks hu haven watch that..i suggest..keep ur money for sth else better.. the show aint worth that amount! its lame..boring.stupid and fairy-tale-y

i guess my immune system is too strong!...wayne gt a bad cough..and its really bad. pity him too. though i drank his drink...i am still okaes.....haix..Y MUX MY IMMUNE SYSTEM BE SO STRONG!!?.....to be sick is the best best besttttttt dieting mtd!

^=)^

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yoz..din blog these 2 days

perharps......ssss..i went out too much. dun even have the time to blog. oh no~~~...speakin' bout the going out too much, i feel so so so guility~coz i din study much or shld i say..at all!..haha.i'll juz blog a short entry and then cont' in the next one coz i got to leave for pw meeting....~sighz~ let me see..

sunday
i went to town with wayne, cam, ph and subsequently, sh joined us. i din meet these guys for bout..a mth o so. still the same old thing, i guess. actually i din wanna go out that day but coz i felt bad...so..i went out. sUpposedly to watch movie. but..in the end, we din as there werent really any nice show and also, i became dulan wif wayne!...llolx..wat he says..i think muz be nv think before one. so pissed!.but its only for a while. after which i tok to him again [-.-] they ate so much that day..eat n eat..lllolx..its also only that day that i go to know some ridiculous stuff again..YET AGAIN!...haha....i wonder when will those stuff stop tagging each other.

^out^

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*phew* tired.

back from watching the fireworks and talking to jas n cam.

the fireworks are still so beautiful. but every "bOmp" has a different feelin now.
though i admit..i misss those feelins...haha..coz..the feelins are nt ther anymore.
lolx

i juz din meet jas n cam for about 4 weeks and so much had happened.

esp, jas.

below msg is for jas...the rest...==keeP OUT==







tO jas:

i think yu looked haggard. haix...i see yu like that now..i seriously dun noe wat to do. i miss yr smiile. i think yu urself miss it too. dun do this to urself. =(. we are all veri sad for yu..yu noe. its sad to see my laughing mate cry. i felt like cryig when i saw yu crying juz nw too but i had to be ther for yu...i cant cry..yea?!.... hmm..i really dunoe how to express myself anymore now.!!
i jux feel tat..he is nt worth it!..the consequences are obvious...aint so????????
i feel lilke scolding yu but i dunnoe wher to start toooo....arrrrr....
i am like standing one side..seeing yu drown.......i dunnoe which float can help yu the most.haix~
i understand that it is hard to come out. everyone needs time.TIME TIME TIME!...
buut..think of it....i rather yu to be sad now for maybe a few weeks or a mth or so rather then yu happy sd happy sad happy sad and at last sad for a FEW MANY mths or even yrs if yu are scarred....its for life...for life!!!..i dunnoe...i have said everythin i can. when i se yu...aso think..oh no..no hope aldy. but......arr....
i juz wanna remind yu...my dear dear fren...no matter which path to go along..dun regret.coz, its simply ur own choice, so think properly yea..

_koonx-

^sponge^

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i am mugging hard nowadays, at least in sch?..during my long long breaks

all i can say is..my pride pushes me to work. i believe that is the main and strongest reason!

my pride!
my pride!!
my pride!!!
my PRIDE!!!!

maybe cox i am taking 3As now and the rest of the class are still taking 4As..so i have more time....logically i shld do better than them!...so i juz cannt let myself doing lousier than them. if not my pride would hurt! i wouldnt wan peeps to say.."aiyo..those ppeeps...dropped subjects aldy still do until lilke that"..arrr.....cannt!!!!!!!!

^pride to heights^

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finally, i have the time to type this. llolx.

Dreams and reality. Something i think it seems sometimes soooo hard to differentiate. It seems the same some times. yet yu noe, they can never ever be the same.

How true can dreams be and how true are reality?

Dreams never seems like reality. dreams feel like dreams. ironically, reality can feel like dreams at least, to me..i feel that way. but then again sometimes yu jus wake up from ur slp thinking..what happened in ur slp. oh...dreams or reality just now...??

IN the midst of dreaming, you noe. you that dream will not come true. Yet some days ltr, it became reality, all of a sudden. yu ursself jux cant believe it too.

While sometimes, reality when recalled back is nothing but feelings of a dream. Everythin feel so distant. When yu try to recall back, you can only feel that yu juz woke up, from a dream. No sense of "realiti-vity"

nah..i'm not gonna state any e.g.s although i have em in mind..ya...but i think the thing about dreams and reality is certainly veri sad esp when the past reality is fading to a dream..=`(

^Dreams, realiTy^

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llol...kinda happie today..abit..i received a cheque today...although its only 10 bucks...but its quite an surprising reward for me!....it is actually get from doing an online survey....and i gt 10 bucks!...haha..initailly i tot its fake..but..it's true!

($.$)

^money-faced^

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I have handed in my subject dropping form today. Finally. Its a burden off me. JUx after we hand in the form..mdn ong toked to us again!...she wanted us to take into consideration of the fact that she would be going into labour soon and so...we should be kinda mentally prepared. yea..of course i tot of that problem too.

in fact ...it can be a serious problem if i slack.......so i hope i'll not. LLol...from tml onwards, i will have lotsa breaks..
mdm ong..thanx..and do take care!=)

seriously i think i feel quite..hmmmm...paiseh? or..dunoe wat word to use to tell peeps that i'm nw a A-level student taking only 3As...=(...but since..i have made up my mind..hu cares about wat others thing?! *consoling myself?* haha..

^one down!^

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